Daily Inspiration 9-29-12

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go." -- Dr Seuss   I have often found myself wanting to help; to help someone else from a place that doesn't appear to me in their best interests. I've often wanted to help so much that it affected me negatively. Some people call that caring, and I call it manipulation. What I have found mainly through the hard knocks of many trials at being a helper is that I need to be a lover instead. But, not the kind of lover that is often tied to this arrangement. I have never heard or read any one say it better than Dr Wayne Dyer. He said that "love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care about to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you." Jesus said it so much shorter and beautifully as well when He said to "love your enemies." In all the years of trying to help others more than they wanted to help themselves, I've learned to do that just for a very little while, then let them, or rather, allow them to do as they choose for themselves and not to insist or expect that they do anything that would satisfy me, or that I expect. Just love them where they are and what they've chosen, even when they claim to not have chosen the circumstances they are in, or if they blame external parties for their situation. It's interesting that when I stand back and really watch, it is absolutely obvious that it is a personal choice for them. I have a big heart and want to help but it isn't very effective at achieving that objective--or at least, the way that I would want to see it be effective. I've tried that in business as well, and the best thing that I can do is just to love them where they are and not do anything more than that (after my initial heartfelt efforts, of course). I don't see it as resignation, or abandonment, or not being compassionate. Instead, I see it as healthy for both of us. If I were to remain disappointed in their choices, it wouldn't really be love. Unconditional love seems hard at first, but once I truly understood the concept of it and was willing to stand on that and be good with it, all that changed. . . for the better.

I Would Love To Have The Same Love In Return For My Own Choices. . . And Consequences.    Spread Some Joy Today--Now it makes more sense to love yourself FIRST.