To
some the concept of being yourself--the real you--is easy, and they live that
all day every day. The rest of us have had a great deal of practice at adding
layers upon layers of labels, titles, expectations, criticisms, and more that
make it very difficult to even know what it means to be ourselves, let alone
actually be that way. We have sort of become those things. I am this, I am that,
I do this, I do that. Some of it is functions that we do in our lives, some of
it is pure ego trying to make us more in other people's eyes than we really are.
It's as if we walk around with this facade like we are in costume in a play,
changing roles all the time.
So,
when I've read or heard, 'be yourself,' I might think, 'easy for you to say!'
Or, I might think, 'I wonder what that is like to be myself.' But, I've really
been focusing on exactly what that is for me of late, and the way that
started was by opening awareness to how I've talked when speaking to others,
thoughts that might go through my brain, how I felt, or the emotions I was
feeling and so on. Awareness is sort of like being able to be outside of
ourselves and inside at the same time--to become a watcher.
With
this, I can see if I'm going with a label I think someone would like, or if I'm
being myself and talking about what I do or have done on request or interest.
You know how that goes. . . someone says what they are doing and I start
spouting my recent accomplishments (however recent they may really be. . .),
what I'm going to do and so on. In this I am trying to impress rather than be
there. When I do this, I'm not even really there. By awareness, I can see me
beginning to talk that way or think those thoughts and I can then stop myself
and let it go. That past training is pretty thick, but this awareness really
does help cut through it.
Another
thing that really seems to help is to pretend that everyone is equal. What I
mean by that is that there is no one, regardless of their title or station, or
group affiliation that is more, nor less than me. I call it leveling the field.
I'm not better, they are not better, I am not worse, they are not worse. We are
all one in that way, though we may have radically different duties, talents and
connections. As Dr. John Demartini says so well, 'don't put people on pedestals
or in a pit.'
We
can then respect someone's current station, such as the President of the United
States, but at the same time, respect our own station. It needs to be a level
playing field, where we can love each other for who we are including what they
do.
A
s
I do these things, I'm uncovering layer by layer that person who is just me and
getting to know that me, and I'm liking it a great deal.
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